Since I didn't do weird news yesterday, I thought I'd do a quickie today. I also thought I'd write a short little blog post...

Anywho, here's a little story for ya. Some Canadian businessmen used black bears to defend their crop. Now unfortunately, what they're growing is illegal. And feeding the bears dogfood to get them to stay in the area is illegal. So now, about 15 black bears are roont, thousands of dollars were spent in legal fees, and people are going to be locked up.

What was the crop?

Cannabis sativa.

I know I have kind of a controversial view of this plant in some of the circles I run in. Being a member of my church, I should refrain from drugs. I agree with this to an extent, although I think my ideals are quite a bit different from someone who leaves the hospital with a vaccinated circumcised baby and a prescription for anti-depressants.

As I've stated before, I believe that one should be able to grow an herb for personal use in one's garden. I would like to have a marijuana plant nestled in next to my oregano, basil, and chamomile. If I'm stressed, I'd like to be able to make myself a cup of tea to relax instead eating of a fat bowl of ice cream or popping a pill. Now, I realize there are other ways to de-stress, but I feel like it should be my choice whether of not to ingest a particular plant.

The war on drugs is a joke. And although this story is from Canada, the same sort of illogic applies here in this country as well. The govt could have made so much more money sanctioning this farm, taking taxes, and regulating the sale of the plants. No bears would have been harmed, no one would have gone to jail, and those patients who need to use rather than abuse could have had a safer alternative.

All that being said, I feel (as always) that I should post a disclaimer. I don't take this substance into my body. If I did, I'm sure this post would be funnier. Also because it's illegal. So my husband, who is blind, will continue to have problems with his vision, will continue to be in pain, and will continue to remain stressed simply because it is illegal in this state and most of this country to self-medicate with marijuana.

This post could be so much longer, but I'll spare you. I know that most you dear readers, don't advocate the use of this plant for many reasons.

But I bet you'll agree, the story would've been much better if it had been the arresting officers were eating dogfood and smoking pot rather than the bears...

Guess:
Guess what y'all?
I've been writing this blog for a year now.

guess what else.
I reached my lose 15 pounds, get a subscription (prescription?) to a fashion mag. goal. I know, fashion mags don't really seem like my thing, but I'm a deep, deep well.

I'm close to my be comfortable in the next size down in jeans by the end of the summer goal too. I'm going with the technical end of summer here - September 21st.

My junk is not your treasure, it's still junk:
I survived the yard sale. I didn't make enough to feel like it was worth it. I also didn't sell my obnoxious neighbor, but that may have been slightly illegal if I had, so it's probably better that I didn't. I made $80, met some colorful yard-salers, and got a sunburn...on my chin. Which is what happens when you wear your cute hat with a short brim that you bought in Baltimore. I also realized that yard sales are like childbirth. You only have one every few years so you sort of forget how painful they are. Remind me the next time I say I want a yard sale, OK?

Tease:
Bud turned 6 in the last couple of weeks. I won't tell you exactly what day, just in case you're a stalker. I made a volcano cake for him that actually erupted, but my friend took the video because we can't find our cameras, so I have to wait for him to give me a copy of it. So you'll have to wait for the amazing, fabulous, unbelievable volcano cake. Sorry.

Butterfly kisses, dipped in flower petals, and deep-fried in cuteness:
My friend Eve had her beautiful baby. Go see her pretty little girl and wish her congratulations. Unless you're a stalker.

Based on a true story:
A kind and beautiful lady helped her daughter move out of her apartment this weekend. The daughter owed her mother money, so it was in the best interest of this nearly-canonized mother to help the daughter. Said mother was on her hands and knees for hours this weekend scrubbing the floors of the apartment to be vacated. Does the daughter have roommates? Why, yes she does! Were the roommates there helping? No, at the time the saintly mom was cleaning the hovel, the roommates were not there. So Mother-Rella was cleaning and scouring, scouring and cleaning. She did not have singing woodland creatures to help her either. The gorgeous and immensely talented mother finished the WC and moved on the pantry. Even angels fall sometimes, and the mother was not feeling her usual incredibly generous self at this point. One may even say she was pissed. The pantry was still full of food, so the mom was moving the food out of the pantry to clean the shelves. Nestled behind 3 boxes of cereal, in the back of the closet, was a large jar labeled catmint. Now, the daughter has been known to self-medicate occasionally with something that looks a lot like what this "catmint" looked like. The size-2 mother with supermodel looks decided to ease her pissy torment by throwing away the catmint. She supposed that misery loves company and she was going to spread it around a little by making someone sorry they had left such a suspicious looking jar of leaves in the pantry for her to find. Embarrassed though she was to tarnish her golden sheen, she took more than a little glee from throwing the entire jar away. That will teach those wretched 20-somethings what's what! Keeping illegal substances is illegal, and the mother who shown with an inner light was ridding the apartment of evil. And making her self feel better in the process. Win-win, right? Except that when the daughter came upstairs and the mother proudly exclaimed what she had done (including finger quotes for the "cat mint"), the daughter burst out laughing. Cat mint, dear readers, is another name for catnip, a harmless herb used to help one get to sleep. The crestfallen, but still beautiful, mother laughed too and realized how silly she was. And then she called her equally beautiful oldest daughter to tell the tale you have just read.

Whatever shall we do about Michael Phelps smoking weed?

Here's my thoughts on the Phelps' BongGate.

Get over it.

Thank you.


Oh.
You probably wanted more, huh? Seeing as how you traveled great distances through dangerous territory to get to this here blog, I guess I can oblige.

OK.
First of all, I don't think marijuana is bad. That is not a very popular opinion within the church I attend but so be it. I feel that used as an herb, marijuana can be helpful and useful to a range of dis-eases. If legal, my garden would contain a small plant snuggled right next to chamomile and lemon balm.

Sadly, it is not legal. So there will be no small plant in MY garden for now. I will not do any illegal thing that will give the govt reason to remove my kids from my ward. They are too precious to me.

I feel the govt has made a non-lethal helpful plant illegal for various reasons, including wanting to collect the revenue created by arresting those who ingest it.

Also, I don't think people should smoke anything. Putting something that is burning/has been burned into your body is harmful. There are much better ways to introduce it to your body.

And one more thing before I make this slightly relevant to Michael Phelps. This is rhetorical so you don't actually have to answer it, but - What is the difference between someone taking a prescription mood-enhancing drug (like say, Prozac) and self-medicating with a plant/herb?

So, having let you see a small amount of my philosophy regarding this, I'll actually relate it to the title of the post. Michael Phelps can do whatever he wants. His smoking weed at a party in SC has absolutely nothing to do with my happy little life out here in the Midwest. If he's high, 900 miles away, it doesn't affect whether or not I take my kids to the library, or whether I decide to play the Wii vs. studying, or what I make for dinner. (makes me sound kind of boring, huh?)

If he has broken some agreement between himself and his sponsors, or some rules within the various swimming organizations to which he belongs, then let them deal with it. I really don't think that banning him from competing in the next Olympics is a valid punishment for making a stupid mistake. Marijuana is a much less dangerous drug to take than alcohol, and yet no one bats an eye if an athlete wants to have a beer or 12 after a competition. And it's his off-season! I really think that his recent behavior has no bearing on what kind of swimmer he is.

But think of the children! Yeah, you do that. If your kid's role model is some kind of sports celebrity, then you have other problems besides whether or not Phelps can compete in 2012.