With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy...

I might be a Redneck because:

1. I've traded a truckful of firewood for 2 goats
2. I've written "Happy No More Probation Day" on a cake in icing (It wasn't for James, Mom)
3. I've taken an off-roading ride to try to get labor started
4. I've hunted snipes
5. I shot a rifle before I was 10
6. I was pregnant at the same time as my mother-in-law (which also might just mean I'm Mormon)
7. I'm related to someone named LuAnn (who also has 3 personalized license plates with her name on it)
8. I have killed fire ant piles with gasoline, many times
9. I have burned Christmas trees in the backyard, many times
10. I have swum naked in a creek, as an adult
11. I have used an M-60 (not the gun, the firework) to clear out a toilet
12. I've set up lawn chairs to watch possible tornadoes
13. I've camped outside without a tent
14. I've driven my truck across rivers
15. I've tubed down rivers several times
16. At times, I crave Waffle House
17. I used to hang out a house belonging to a guy called Hoss
18. I've eaten kudzu in several different dishes
19. I used to wake up to the sound of roosters every morning
20. I've tasted moonshine

You may have heard of a couple of these before, and there are probably many other things I've forgotten, but that's all y'all get today.

For the record, my mother is NOT a redneck. She would probably want me to clarify that.